Happy Birthday, Reaper!
by PixelsShattered
Summary: Hey, it's Reaper's birthday! Inspired by a comic by PokketMowse, so all credit them for the story, I just put it in paragraph form.


**A/N: Hey, I've been meaning to post lately but I've been fighting off writers block practically all summer. Couple that with Overwatch, Tf2, and Steam Sales, and nothing's really gotten done. However, I saw a little comic on iFunny that I thought deserved its own story, so without further ado, here we go.**

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Reaper awoke and began the day as he began any other, with edgy music. However, today was extra-special, even though he was sure nobody else would remember, and he'd gotten himself an extra edgy holodisk as a present to himself. Today was the edgelord's birthday. Which one, he'd quit keeping track. It's not like it _really_ mattered, anyway, seeing as he was now practically a ghost. Do ghosts have rights? He'd have to ask Tracer later.

Reaper went into the kitchen to get himself some extra-dark (like his soul, he liked to say) coffee to finish waking him up. He leaned on the counter as the machine painstakingly slowly strained the coffee, and noticed not a single person was in the commons. At this time of day, and with the amount of people housed in the little Overwatch base, there was little chance that something wasn't up.

Gabe shrugged it off as mere coincidence and grabbed his favorite "I Hate Jack" mug and sat down on the couch to find his favorite TV show was just starting. A satisfying half hour later, he concluded that something was obviously up. Nobody came by, complained about the volume, or even made any noise that would indicate any life in the base. Maybe his wish came true, maybe Overwatch just died overnight. Maybe his days of putting up with Morrison were over, maybe his Payload-shoving hours were done, and maybe his incompetent teammates finally met their ends. He decided to find out.

After his cohort's quarters turned up empty, he decided to check the gym, maybe Zarya was having everyone do one of her "Mother Russian" workouts. The door was locked, and Reaper pressed his ear to the door to see if he could hear anyone on the other side. Aside from a few muffled giggles and 'sshhh's, it was quiet. However, by the amount of muffled giggles and 'sshhh's there were, he concluded that most, if not the entire team was in there. What they were doing without him, and why they were trying to hide it was beyond him.

Reaper considered producing a shotgun and blowing the lock to shards, but he resolved to at least knock first, since Angela wasn't too keen to the constant property damage. He heard someone behind the door, followed by encouragement from the peanut gallery, before Widowmaker's pale purple head poked out through the double doors, and she squeezed herself through as to try and hide whatever was behind them.

He tried to ask her what was going on, but she cut him off. "Vell, as luck would 'ave it, Angela and Fareeha suddenly can't go to this movie…" she said, holding up two tickets to the high noon showing of "The Japanese Cyborg Next Door".

"Hmm" Reaper muttered, interested but too cool to sound so outwardly, "I didn't know they were into those kinds of movies."

"Neither did I…" Widowmaker trailed, looking at the floor to hide the terribly planned lie.

"But since we've got nothing else to do, I'm game." He caved, oblivious to Hana watching them as they left.

"Operation Get Reaper Out Of Here Since We're Not Done Setting Up is a go." She reported. Those two really are perfect for each other, she mused, as she returned to the gym to help the others.

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Reaper and Widowmaker stood outside of the theatre, momentarily stopped by a sign on the door. "No weapons allowed" it read. As Reaper was unsure if his ghostly affinity for creating shotguns out of thin air qualified, Widowmaker wondered if she counted as she was _technically_ created to be the most efficient assassin ever. The two only stopped for a moment though, as rules had never stopped them before.

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Reaper genuinely had a good time, the best in a while, and they returned to the base blanketed in darkness. Reaper knew Symmetra was all about saving power, but all the lights out on such a cloudy day was a little extreme, although he wasn't complaining. He quite liked the new aesthetic, actually. Maybe saving the environment was something he could get behind.

Reaper turned around to look in the direction of a small sound he thought he heard, and when he looked back ahead of him, his purple companion had vanished. Reaper decided to try the gym, since it was locked earlier. Fortunately, this time, it wasn't, and Reaper slowly made his way into the center of the training area before the lights suddenly burst back to life and his teammates jumped from their hiding places.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, REAPER!" they all yelled in sync as the light revealed festivities adorning the area. Black and red letters spelled out 'WE LOVE YOU REAPER' and a sizable pile of gifts sat next to the tallest cake he'd ever seen. Where the punching bags had been hung a piñata likeness of Jack Morrison. Speaking of the man himself, he was nowhere to be found.

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Reaper sat in a chair in the commons, after everyone agreed the gym floor was not the best surface to sit on, and opened his presents one by one. As he set aside a card with a 100$ Hot Topic giftcard in it, Winston handed him one last present that the ape looked very proud of. Although it was shaped suspiciously like a jar of peanut butter, Reaper opened it to find an empty jar with a crumpled piece of paper at the bottom, which he produced and skimmed over. The words that caught his attention first were the title: 'Official Disbandment of Overwatch'.

The edgelord could've hugged Winston right there. It was truly the best birthday ever….

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'Reaper? Hello, Reaper? Gabe? Helloooo?" Angela stood in front of the couch attempting to wake Reyes, and since it was his birthday, it was time for his yearly physical. She finally managed to wake the man, who sat up groggily.

"Sleep well?" she teased, confusion written all over his ace, which soon flashed to disappointment and resolve.

" _Just a dream… It was all just a dream… Figures",_ He told himself as he followed Mercy to her lab.

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 **A/N: That was cool I guess. Hopefully I'll be updating something kinda soon, but I don't know. Until then, I've been Pix, thanks for reading!**


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